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this is an enormous post
I was PARKING LOT WATCH yesterday; it's like neighborhood watch only more badass. Aka: I was really bored at my desk, which has a giant window overlooking the parking lot, and I heard a tremendous crunch and looked down just in time to see two cars -- one parked and one trying to park -- rocking back and forth after one hit the other. As I watched, the trying-to-park car backed up and then pulled into the spot again -- and hit the other car again. The driver got out, looked at the front of her car, and then drove away, but not before I had the entire office watching and had taken down her license plate and make/model of car. The lady went to the back of the parking lot to study her car more closely, then parked and came inside.
This is why people shouldn't drive while wearing an air cast..
Delightfully enough, the parked car that she had hit (twice!) belonged to one of our interns. The driver didn't leave a note or anything, but we obviously knew who she was and exactly where she was going in the building, so we sent Intern down to the parking lot to check out the situation (her SUV was totally fine; the lady's car had a tremendous crumpled dent in the front, like somebody catapulted a barrel at the car) and then we told her to go next door to the doctor's waiting room.
Intern reported back that:
-In the parking lot, she picked up a piece of Lady's car that had fallen off;
-In the waiting room, in front of everybody in the doctor's office, she told Lady who she was and gave her that piece of her car, saying, "You dropped this";
-Lady tried to tell her that she was "going to come find you" after her appointment;
-Lady was very embarrassed.
Up-til-this-moment-very-shy intern is my new hero; we all cried laughing. "YOU DROPPED THIS."
That was the day's excitement. It doesn't quite beat the time that a federal agency orchestrated a drug bust in the parking lot and the agent who'd been disguised as a pizza delivery boy pulled a shotgun out of his trunk, but it was entertaining nonetheless!
I have been watching TV that is not Glee! Spoiler-free thoughts so far on Southland, How I Met Your Mother, American Idol, Bones, White Collar, Community.
Southland: Love the show; did not like last week's episode. It was really, really good, but it was so incredibly depressing the whole way through. It was constant gut-punch. I need at least a little bit of black humor to keep me going, you know? Also, I feel incredibly stupid but I did not understand what Ben's mom meant when she said "handling." If any readers saw the episode and can clue me in (I have vague ideas, but am not sure) in the comments, I would appreciate it!
How I Met Your Mother: Funny, enjoyable; still not as good as the show's heyday, but not as shittyawfulwhydoIwatchthisshow as last season. Robin's whole shtick in the last episode was absolutely wonderful; the best material she's gotten in a while.
American Idol: I actually really like the new judging panel, a lot. Stephen Tyler's like the new Paula, except that he actually makes valid points, and I've been enjoying that Jennifer Lopez is the nice one yet also doesn't hesitate to shut people down.
Bones: I still haven't watched that reportedly ridiculous melodramatic last episode that aired in the fall, and this episode did not make me want to. I'm seriously considering quitting the show. It's not making me angry or anything; it's just not interesting me. At all. I'm really bored. I find Angela and Hodgins's storyline boring; I'm not interested in Booth/Brennan; I'm indifferent to Hannah; I dislike most of the interns. At this point, I'm basically just in it for Cam, Sweets, Daisy, and Wendell, and only half of those characters appear in every episode. The show is just not as fun or funny or affecting as it was several seasons ago.
Community: Fucking love this show. It's magical. I watched the entire season 1 DVD with my parents a few weeks ago and, predictably, my dad doesn't totally get it (I love my dad and he is a brilliant man, but he picks things up slowly and a lot of the jokes on Community go right over his head) and my mom thinks it is the greatest thing ever and wants to adopt Abed as her third child. In the season 1 episode where Pierce starts talking to another black woman, mistaking her for Shirley, there is a later joke where Shirley says something along the lines of, "I hope you're not gonna reach for me when you want something on your pancakes," and I have never seen my mother laugh like that. Seriously. There were tears, she could not breathe, we had to pause the DVD because she couldn't stop and she was missing everything -- and my dad was sitting there, and sitting there, and then he finally said, "Oh! Aunt Jemima!" &parents;
ANYWAY, now that I have rambled forever about my parents: loved the new episode. I am slightly petrified of the possibility of that one thing and hope it's not true, but the episode as a whole was hilarious and I hope it means that Yvette Nicole Brown gets more screentime, more jokes, and more to do. Shirley is awesome and under-utilized.
White Collar: I rofl'd at that one character riding a horse; he or she looked SO INCREDIBLY UNCOMFORTABLE. I mean, I was not a champion or anything, but I used to ride and spend a lot of time around horses and THAT IS NOT HOW YOU RIDE HAHAHA. I liked the Ocean's 11-y feel of the episode, and I actually really enjoyed Sara for the first time. 1) She wears the best clothes; 2) I like looking at her (aka: she is VERY ATTRACTIVE); 3) she's occasionally fiery but mostly super competent and collected, and I like all three aspects of her personality; 4) I like her a lot more when she's being barbed-flirty instead of just plain barbed-irritated, like she was in earlier appearances. Elizabeth is the best and I still worship at Diana Brannigan's feet.
Royal Pains: This space is blank because I haven't seen last night's episode yet. I can pretty much guess what I'll say after I see it, though: lol, MacGuyver'd medical solution of the night; Dr. Emily is incredibly irritating; why am I watching this show; DIVYA DIVYA DIVYA BEST BEST BEST.
Justified: I have to decide if I'm going to pick this up again. I actually still haven't watched last year's season finale. It's one of those shows where I'm able to recognize that it's really quality, but I'm just not able to get into it.
Terriers & Sons of Anarchy: Both currently off the air (Terriers for good), but I need to catch up on both! Both shows -- especially Sons of Anarchy -- view much more easily and smoothly when you watch episodes all in a row.
I'm experimenting with a Pandora radio station based on the prompt "Glee cast." It is uproarious. I spent half my afternoon yesterday laughing every time a new song by an eighties hair band or from a Disney movie came on. This is the track list for an hour or two:
There was SO MUCH Journey. So much! Also, lots of Wicked and songs from Enchanted. GOOD WORK, PANDORA.
The rest of this post is going to be about Glee, since it's pretty much my only fandom at this point and now that they're filming again and the show is due back in a little over two weeks, there are spoilers exploding out of every possible place. AHHHHHH SPOILERS. Lauren gets a solo(!!!) in an upcoming episode and, to combat stage fright(...?), she uses a trick that Puck(!!!) suggested: picturing everybody in their underwear. Which is a delusion that we will see. Oh show, SO MUCH FAN SERVICE.
Also:
I am excited despite my better judgment. Also, despite not believing for a second that Brittany/Santana was always planned.
AND FINALLY: SONG PREVIEWS.
I AM PEEING MYSELF AT "BILLS BILLS BILLS." The other songs sound fine, etc. etc., but AHAHAHAHAHA DESTINY'S CHILD. ♥♥♥
Day 01 - Your favorite male character
Day 02 - Your favorite female character
Day 03 - Your favorite group performance
Day 04 - Your favorite solo
Day 05 - Your favorite duet
Day 06 - Your favorite Rachel/Finn moment
Day 07 - Your favorite Finn-Kurt moment
Day 08 - Your favorite Quinn/Puck moment
Day 09 - Your favorite Kurt-Mercedes moment
Day 10 - Your favorite Santana/Brittany moment
Day 11 - Your favorite Sue Sylvester moment
Day 12 - The couple you ship the MOST
Day 13 - A scene/moment that pissed you off
Day 14 - A scene/moment that made you cry
Day 15 - A scene/moment that made you happy
Day 16 - Your favorite episode
Day 17 - Your least favorite episode
Day 18 - Your least favorite character
Day 19 - Your least favorite performance
Day 20 - Your favorite quote
Day 21 - Your favorite guest-star
Day 22 - Your least favorite guest-star
Day 23 - The character you most relate to
Day 24 - The character you would like to hear/see more of
Day 25 - Something that happened you wish hadn’t
Day 26 - Something that hadn’t happened but you wish had
Day 27 - Your idea for a future Glee episode
Day 28 - Your idea for a future Glee character
Day 29 - Your idea for a future Glee performance
Day 30 - Whatever tickles your fancy
I've got several options that make me teary. I'm a sucker for when the cast sings "Keep Holding On" and Quinn is going through the motions and trying not to cry (and several other characters are also shiny-eyed behind her); ditto for when they find out the results after regionals and they're all looking gut-punched and somebody says, "We didn't even place." Other scenes that choke me up: "Just the Way You Are" and the entire brother-dance at the wedding; the post-"Rose's Turn" scene between the Hummels.
I probably cry the hardest at "Just the Way You Are," because as cheesy and ridiculous as it is, it's such a sweet gesture from Finn and Kurt gets to dance with a boy, and I find the "don't change; you're perfect the way you are" message of the song so moving, especially given their history and the fact that Finn isn't always comfortable with Kurt being who he is. But the scene that makes me cry that has stuck with me for the longest is the clear winner.
A scene/moment that made you cry: Kurt coming out to Burt
I was tanked (thank you, cheap champagne that was going to go flat if somebody didn't drink it) and alone when I first saw this episode, and I was still slowly accepting the fact that I didn't want to date any more boys and I hadn't come out to my family yet, and so Burt's gruff, easy acceptance and "I know," and the hug and the relief on Kurt's face just made me sob. I've seen the scene five or six times by now, and I still cry every single time.
(I make the hideous-est of gifs. Please ignore it.)
* * *
Burt already picked something out for Kurt's birthday.
The wrapped package is hidden in the desk at the garage, because he knows that when she sees it, Melissa's gonna look at him that way she does when he stares at Kurt a little too long after he clomps around in his mom's heels, or when Burt tried to convince Kurt that he didn't want the bike with the sparkly pink streamers on the handlebars. Like he's letting the two of them down; like she's disappointed in him. She won't say anything, she'll just look, and that's worse.
And honestly, Burt knows what Kurt's gonna do when he tears apart that wrapping paper. He's going to see the perfectly worn-in, sized-just-right Rawling glove, and his face is going to fall. He'll go along and give it a shot when Burt suggests they go outside and throw a ball around, but he'll duck out of the way of even the gentlest underhand tosses and he won't want to dive for it (grass stains), and no matter how many times Burt shows him how to turn and throw from the shoulder, he's going to face Burt dead-on and fling with his elbow and wrist.
Burt knows his kid well enough to know that if Kurt opens the thing that Burt's looking at now, instead, his face will light up like a Christmas tree. He'll put it on and throw his arms around Burt's neck in a lightning-fast hug before he bolts for the nearest mirror, and then he'll waltz around the house singing "the hills are aliiiive" for hours.
"Ah, hell," Burt mutters, rubbing the back of his neck, and the girl wearing the movie theater's vest-and-bowtie uniform (Kurt fits right in, like a mini employee in brighter colors) glances up.
"Can I help you?" she asks, settling her glasses higher on her nose as she slides down to the end of the merchandise table where he's standing.
"Yeah," says Burt, before he can change his mind. "How much is the, uh," he points, "the hat?"
"You mean Maria's bonnet," says the girl. She can't be much older than 16 or 17; her smile flashes a mouthful of the brightest (orange and lime green) braces Burt has ever seen. She's got pink hair, which makes her the kind of kid he doesn't exactly see on a daily basis in Lima.
"Right," he says, kind of bewildered, and he glances from side to side (no sign of Melissa and Kurt; people milling around, nobody paying any attention to the guy who's been staring at a table full of hats and dolls and CDs and little white flowers) and then fumbles his wallet out of his back pocket. "Whatever."
She peers up at him over the rim of her glasses. "It's $20."
He shifts his weight -- seriously? $20 for a hat with some strings on it? -- but he pulls a twenty out of his wallet and forks it over. "That's highway robbery, you know," he says gruffly.
The girl slips the bill into the cash drawer and expertly wraps the hat up in tissue paper, whipping a plastic bag out of nowhere. "I know," she says, rolling her eyes cheerfully. "But your daughter's gonna love it."
Burt freezes with his wallet halfway in his pocket. The girl is looking up at him expectantly, her face sweet and open under that cotton candy hair; she's smiling.
"...Yeah," Burt says, and he tucks the bonnet into his jacket. When Kurt and Melissa come back from the bathroom, Burt focuses on the smile on his kid's face as he talks excitedly about dresses made out of curtains, and he tries to keep the bag inside his jacket from crinkling too loudly.
Baby steps.
This is why people shouldn't drive while wearing an air cast..
Delightfully enough, the parked car that she had hit (twice!) belonged to one of our interns. The driver didn't leave a note or anything, but we obviously knew who she was and exactly where she was going in the building, so we sent Intern down to the parking lot to check out the situation (her SUV was totally fine; the lady's car had a tremendous crumpled dent in the front, like somebody catapulted a barrel at the car) and then we told her to go next door to the doctor's waiting room.
Intern reported back that:
-In the parking lot, she picked up a piece of Lady's car that had fallen off;
-In the waiting room, in front of everybody in the doctor's office, she told Lady who she was and gave her that piece of her car, saying, "You dropped this";
-Lady tried to tell her that she was "going to come find you" after her appointment;
-Lady was very embarrassed.
Up-til-this-moment-very-shy intern is my new hero; we all cried laughing. "YOU DROPPED THIS."
That was the day's excitement. It doesn't quite beat the time that a federal agency orchestrated a drug bust in the parking lot and the agent who'd been disguised as a pizza delivery boy pulled a shotgun out of his trunk, but it was entertaining nonetheless!
I have been watching TV that is not Glee! Spoiler-free thoughts so far on Southland, How I Met Your Mother, American Idol, Bones, White Collar, Community.
Southland: Love the show; did not like last week's episode. It was really, really good, but it was so incredibly depressing the whole way through. It was constant gut-punch. I need at least a little bit of black humor to keep me going, you know? Also, I feel incredibly stupid but I did not understand what Ben's mom meant when she said "handling." If any readers saw the episode and can clue me in (I have vague ideas, but am not sure) in the comments, I would appreciate it!
How I Met Your Mother: Funny, enjoyable; still not as good as the show's heyday, but not as shittyawfulwhydoIwatchthisshow as last season. Robin's whole shtick in the last episode was absolutely wonderful; the best material she's gotten in a while.
American Idol: I actually really like the new judging panel, a lot. Stephen Tyler's like the new Paula, except that he actually makes valid points, and I've been enjoying that Jennifer Lopez is the nice one yet also doesn't hesitate to shut people down.
Bones: I still haven't watched that reportedly ridiculous melodramatic last episode that aired in the fall, and this episode did not make me want to. I'm seriously considering quitting the show. It's not making me angry or anything; it's just not interesting me. At all. I'm really bored. I find Angela and Hodgins's storyline boring; I'm not interested in Booth/Brennan; I'm indifferent to Hannah; I dislike most of the interns. At this point, I'm basically just in it for Cam, Sweets, Daisy, and Wendell, and only half of those characters appear in every episode. The show is just not as fun or funny or affecting as it was several seasons ago.
Community: Fucking love this show. It's magical. I watched the entire season 1 DVD with my parents a few weeks ago and, predictably, my dad doesn't totally get it (I love my dad and he is a brilliant man, but he picks things up slowly and a lot of the jokes on Community go right over his head) and my mom thinks it is the greatest thing ever and wants to adopt Abed as her third child. In the season 1 episode where Pierce starts talking to another black woman, mistaking her for Shirley, there is a later joke where Shirley says something along the lines of, "I hope you're not gonna reach for me when you want something on your pancakes," and I have never seen my mother laugh like that. Seriously. There were tears, she could not breathe, we had to pause the DVD because she couldn't stop and she was missing everything -- and my dad was sitting there, and sitting there, and then he finally said, "Oh! Aunt Jemima!" &parents;
ANYWAY, now that I have rambled forever about my parents: loved the new episode. I am slightly petrified of the possibility of that one thing and hope it's not true, but the episode as a whole was hilarious and I hope it means that Yvette Nicole Brown gets more screentime, more jokes, and more to do. Shirley is awesome and under-utilized.
White Collar: I rofl'd at that one character riding a horse; he or she looked SO INCREDIBLY UNCOMFORTABLE. I mean, I was not a champion or anything, but I used to ride and spend a lot of time around horses and THAT IS NOT HOW YOU RIDE HAHAHA. I liked the Ocean's 11-y feel of the episode, and I actually really enjoyed Sara for the first time. 1) She wears the best clothes; 2) I like looking at her (aka: she is VERY ATTRACTIVE); 3) she's occasionally fiery but mostly super competent and collected, and I like all three aspects of her personality; 4) I like her a lot more when she's being barbed-flirty instead of just plain barbed-irritated, like she was in earlier appearances. Elizabeth is the best and I still worship at Diana Brannigan's feet.
Royal Pains: This space is blank because I haven't seen last night's episode yet. I can pretty much guess what I'll say after I see it, though: lol, MacGuyver'd medical solution of the night; Dr. Emily is incredibly irritating; why am I watching this show; DIVYA DIVYA DIVYA BEST BEST BEST.
Justified: I have to decide if I'm going to pick this up again. I actually still haven't watched last year's season finale. It's one of those shows where I'm able to recognize that it's really quality, but I'm just not able to get into it.
Terriers & Sons of Anarchy: Both currently off the air (Terriers for good), but I need to catch up on both! Both shows -- especially Sons of Anarchy -- view much more easily and smoothly when you watch episodes all in a row.
I'm experimenting with a Pandora radio station based on the prompt "Glee cast." It is uproarious. I spent half my afternoon yesterday laughing every time a new song by an eighties hair band or from a Disney movie came on. This is the track list for an hour or two:
"Keep Holding On," Glee cast
"A Whole New World," Disney's Aladdin
"Let It Be," the Beatles (live)
"(I Just) Died in Your Arms Tonight," Cutting Crew
"Over the Rainbow/What a Wonderful World," Israel Kamakawiwo'ole
"Take On Me," A-Ha
"Keep on Loving You," REO Speedwagon
"Something There," Beauty and the Beast Broadway original cast recording
"I'm Yours," Jason Mraz
"Bad Romance," Lady Gaga
"Take Me or Leave Me," RENT
"Stand by Me," John Lennon
"Your Song," Elton John
"Three Little Birds," Bob Marley
"867-5309/Jenny," Tommy Tutone
"Jack and Diane," John Mellencamp
There was SO MUCH Journey. So much! Also, lots of Wicked and songs from Enchanted. GOOD WORK, PANDORA.
The rest of this post is going to be about Glee, since it's pretty much my only fandom at this point and now that they're filming again and the show is due back in a little over two weeks, there are spoilers exploding out of every possible place. AHHHHHH SPOILERS. Lauren gets a solo(!!!) in an upcoming episode and, to combat stage fright(...?), she uses a trick that Puck(!!!) suggested: picturing everybody in their underwear. Which is a delusion that we will see. Oh show, SO MUCH FAN SERVICE.
Also:
I am excited despite my better judgment. Also, despite not believing for a second that Brittany/Santana was always planned.
AND FINALLY: SONG PREVIEWS.
I AM PEEING MYSELF AT "BILLS BILLS BILLS." The other songs sound fine, etc. etc., but AHAHAHAHAHA DESTINY'S CHILD. ♥♥♥
Day 01 - Your favorite male character
Day 02 - Your favorite female character
Day 03 - Your favorite group performance
Day 04 - Your favorite solo
Day 05 - Your favorite duet
Day 06 - Your favorite Rachel/Finn moment
Day 07 - Your favorite Finn-Kurt moment
Day 08 - Your favorite Quinn/Puck moment
Day 09 - Your favorite Kurt-Mercedes moment
Day 10 - Your favorite Santana/Brittany moment
Day 11 - Your favorite Sue Sylvester moment
Day 12 - The couple you ship the MOST
Day 13 - A scene/moment that pissed you off
Day 14 - A scene/moment that made you cry
Day 15 - A scene/moment that made you happy
Day 16 - Your favorite episode
Day 17 - Your least favorite episode
Day 18 - Your least favorite character
Day 19 - Your least favorite performance
Day 20 - Your favorite quote
Day 21 - Your favorite guest-star
Day 22 - Your least favorite guest-star
Day 23 - The character you most relate to
Day 24 - The character you would like to hear/see more of
Day 25 - Something that happened you wish hadn’t
Day 26 - Something that hadn’t happened but you wish had
Day 27 - Your idea for a future Glee episode
Day 28 - Your idea for a future Glee character
Day 29 - Your idea for a future Glee performance
Day 30 - Whatever tickles your fancy
I've got several options that make me teary. I'm a sucker for when the cast sings "Keep Holding On" and Quinn is going through the motions and trying not to cry (and several other characters are also shiny-eyed behind her); ditto for when they find out the results after regionals and they're all looking gut-punched and somebody says, "We didn't even place." Other scenes that choke me up: "Just the Way You Are" and the entire brother-dance at the wedding; the post-"Rose's Turn" scene between the Hummels.
I probably cry the hardest at "Just the Way You Are," because as cheesy and ridiculous as it is, it's such a sweet gesture from Finn and Kurt gets to dance with a boy, and I find the "don't change; you're perfect the way you are" message of the song so moving, especially given their history and the fact that Finn isn't always comfortable with Kurt being who he is. But the scene that makes me cry that has stuck with me for the longest is the clear winner.
A scene/moment that made you cry: Kurt coming out to Burt
I was tanked (thank you, cheap champagne that was going to go flat if somebody didn't drink it) and alone when I first saw this episode, and I was still slowly accepting the fact that I didn't want to date any more boys and I hadn't come out to my family yet, and so Burt's gruff, easy acceptance and "I know," and the hug and the relief on Kurt's face just made me sob. I've seen the scene five or six times by now, and I still cry every single time.
(I make the hideous-est of gifs. Please ignore it.)
* * *
Burt already picked something out for Kurt's birthday.
The wrapped package is hidden in the desk at the garage, because he knows that when she sees it, Melissa's gonna look at him that way she does when he stares at Kurt a little too long after he clomps around in his mom's heels, or when Burt tried to convince Kurt that he didn't want the bike with the sparkly pink streamers on the handlebars. Like he's letting the two of them down; like she's disappointed in him. She won't say anything, she'll just look, and that's worse.
And honestly, Burt knows what Kurt's gonna do when he tears apart that wrapping paper. He's going to see the perfectly worn-in, sized-just-right Rawling glove, and his face is going to fall. He'll go along and give it a shot when Burt suggests they go outside and throw a ball around, but he'll duck out of the way of even the gentlest underhand tosses and he won't want to dive for it (grass stains), and no matter how many times Burt shows him how to turn and throw from the shoulder, he's going to face Burt dead-on and fling with his elbow and wrist.
Burt knows his kid well enough to know that if Kurt opens the thing that Burt's looking at now, instead, his face will light up like a Christmas tree. He'll put it on and throw his arms around Burt's neck in a lightning-fast hug before he bolts for the nearest mirror, and then he'll waltz around the house singing "the hills are aliiiive" for hours.
"Ah, hell," Burt mutters, rubbing the back of his neck, and the girl wearing the movie theater's vest-and-bowtie uniform (Kurt fits right in, like a mini employee in brighter colors) glances up.
"Can I help you?" she asks, settling her glasses higher on her nose as she slides down to the end of the merchandise table where he's standing.
"Yeah," says Burt, before he can change his mind. "How much is the, uh," he points, "the hat?"
"You mean Maria's bonnet," says the girl. She can't be much older than 16 or 17; her smile flashes a mouthful of the brightest (orange and lime green) braces Burt has ever seen. She's got pink hair, which makes her the kind of kid he doesn't exactly see on a daily basis in Lima.
"Right," he says, kind of bewildered, and he glances from side to side (no sign of Melissa and Kurt; people milling around, nobody paying any attention to the guy who's been staring at a table full of hats and dolls and CDs and little white flowers) and then fumbles his wallet out of his back pocket. "Whatever."
She peers up at him over the rim of her glasses. "It's $20."
He shifts his weight -- seriously? $20 for a hat with some strings on it? -- but he pulls a twenty out of his wallet and forks it over. "That's highway robbery, you know," he says gruffly.
The girl slips the bill into the cash drawer and expertly wraps the hat up in tissue paper, whipping a plastic bag out of nowhere. "I know," she says, rolling her eyes cheerfully. "But your daughter's gonna love it."
Burt freezes with his wallet halfway in his pocket. The girl is looking up at him expectantly, her face sweet and open under that cotton candy hair; she's smiling.
"...Yeah," Burt says, and he tucks the bonnet into his jacket. When Kurt and Melissa come back from the bathroom, Burt focuses on the smile on his kid's face as he talks excitedly about dresses made out of curtains, and he tries to keep the bag inside his jacket from crinkling too loudly.
Baby steps.